Zen Your Way Out of Bad Meetings

Conflict Zen has become one of my "must reads" lately. Author Tammy Lenski shares Seven Simple Hacks Guaranteed to Improve Your Meetings that collects several of her posts on conflict resolution in groups. I'd recommend her tips to any lawyer who meets with clients regularly, especially this one:

Have you ever been in a meeting where the chair asked somethinglike, "Does that plan sound ok to everyone?" Perhaps there was a briefpause, an assenting remark or two, a couple of nods and silence fromthe rest. "All right, then it’s a go," the chair may have said then.

Silence does not mean "Yes, I agree." Silence can mean: I’m stillthinking about it. I may agree but am not sure yet. Yes, I agree. No, Idon’t agree but I’m not going to say it out loud here. No, I don’tagree but I’ll never admit to it.

If you’re trying to make a wise and effective decision in a group,avoid the "assumed yes" trap. When there’s silence, ask those folkswhat their silence means. Don’t challenge, invite.

Silence usually means I’m thinking.